In one of the (very few actually) parenting books I have read, it talks about accidental parenting. The author of
The Baby Whisperer, Tracey Hogg, writes of it in regards to how a baby learns to sleep. (Not sure if she coined the term or not, but it is the only place I have heard it.) Parents start doing something out of desperation or simplicity and discover down the road that they have "taught" their child to go to sleep a certain way even though they don't wish to continue in that routine.
Even though she is writing about it in a negative light on sleep habits. I think a little bit of this "accidental parenting" happens to everyone. A routine or method, any part of parenting really, is kind of fallen into and becomes the norm without a real decision ever being made. The situation determines whether this is negative or positive or neutral. The idea that came across to me is that if something is important, than you need to be intentional. Think it through, decide how you want to handle certain issues, like discipline, before you are in the middle of a situation. Don't just react.
Parenting a one year old is completing different from parenting an infant. I still find it pretty intimidating really. That Josh and I are in many ways responsible for how this little person turns out. That we have to train her and not just tell her what to do. And I'm sure this will only get more complicated as she gets older. They (whoever they are) say that a child learns what is caught more than taught. It has really made me think a lot about my own life and especially my walk with the Lord. There are so many good things that I want for her - for her future, her character, her relationship with God - and it makes me want those things for myself too.
So what about you parenting veterans? Have you found yourself doing any accidental parenting? Things that have become issues down the road to avoid? Things that have turned out great? (Go ahead, give yourself a pat on the back and we'll pretend that was on purpose.)
